Confessions
by lizardwriter
Summary: Emily is gay and JJ just found out. JJ's reacting weirdly...is it possible she's not straight? Ok I suck at summaries. Please read and Review. Rated M for potential future content and some bad language.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own Criminal Minds and am not profiting from this in any way. Please don't sue.

"Wow!" Emily said, staring off towards the entrance of the bar as she put three beer mugs down on the table.

"What?" Garcia asked, picking up her beer and following the path of Emily's eyes.

JJ turned to look too.

Emily blushed a little as she turned back to her friends. "Nothing, it's just that girl who just came in was really hot."

Garcia's eyes widened, but JJ was confused.

"What?" She asked.

"You mean you…?" Garcia said in a shocked voice.

"I'm gay." Emily said matter-of-factly as she took her seat.

"Wow! How come I didn't know?" Garcia asked accusingly.

"Wait, are you actually admitting that you: Tech Goddess and Gossip Queen don't know everything?" Emily teased.

Garcia glared. "Well now that I know this, I know everything." She replied, preening a little.

Emily laughed. She turned back to see if she could catch sight of the leggy brunette who she'd been eyeing before, when JJ caught her eye. "Umm…Jayj?" She said, nudging her friend gently.

JJ was in shock. She didn't really know why Emily's revelation shocked her so much, it just did. It's not like she had a problem with it. She didn't. She just hadn't expected it. She felt a small knot form in her stomach.

"JJ?" Emily nudged her friend again.

JJ shook her head and looked at Emily. "Wha…? Sorry." She said.

"You ok?" Emily asked.

"Yeah. Yeah. I'm fine." JJ said putting on a smile.

"Sorry if I kinda shocked you. I just tend to keep my private life separate from my work life. You gals have to admit that it's hard enough as it is in our field just being a woman. I don't want my sexuality to make it even harder."

Garcia and JJ nodded in agreement.

"Don't worry sweetie. We won't tell anyone. We'll just keep this juicy tidbit to ourselves and hold it over you." Garcia grinned at Emily who rolled her eyes.

"Gee thanks. What a lucky girl I am to have friends like you." Emily responded sarcastically.

All three women giggled. For some reason, though, JJ continued to find herself distracted. She was only half paying attention to the banter between her two colleagues. Questions were bombarding her brain. _How long has Emily been gay? Has she actually had sex with other women? How many? Is she actually dating someone now? Has she ever dated someone from work? Who else at work is gay that I don't know about? _

Half of her really wanted to ask Emily those questions, but the restrained, professional part of her thought better of it. They worked together and there were social lined that JJ tried not to cross. It really wasn't any of JJ's business who Emily had slept with and she knew it. Emily and Garcia started laughing again and JJ joined in, not wanting it to seem like she hadn't been paying attention.

Emily leaned back in her chair laughing at Garcia's most recent quip. She took the opportunity to observe JJ. JJ's reaction had intrigued her. Garcia had reacted exactly like Emily had thought she would to her little revelation. JJ, however, had not. Emily had assumed that JJ would be surprised, but largely unfazed. Instead, the petite blonde had clearly been shocked and had seemed distracted ever since the revelation. Emily knew that JJ wasn't prejudice, so she knew that wasn't it, so why was JJ acting so strange?

"Ok, so who have you slept with? Anyone we know?" Garcia pried.

JJ squirmed in her seat. "Garcia, that's none of our business!" She scolded in a hushed voice.

"Speak for yourself." Garcia replied. "Everything is my business, and besides, I want to know!"

Emily smiled to herself as she watched JJ struggle with what appeared to be a mixture of curiosity and prudence. She turned to Garcia.

"I thought that now that you knew I was gay, you knew everything." She couldn't resist.

Garcia rolled her eyes. "Ok, maybe there are still some small gaps in my knowledge. Now dish!" She responded. Garcia leaned forward eagerly and glanced at JJ. She was kind of surprised by JJ's apparent lack of interest. JJ had picked up her beer and appeared to be examining it intently. Garcia turned her attention back to Emily and waved for her to go on.

Emily sighed. "Garcia, does it seem like I've had much of a love life since I've been at the B.A.U.? I haven't slept with anyone you know." Ok, it was a lie, but it was a little lie.

"Name some names anyway." Garcia persisted.

_Crap!_ Emily sighed again. She should have known better than to think that Garcia would just accept her first response. "Ok…um…there was Lauren Jackson and Jenny Cartwright and Audrey Smith…" She looked at Garcia who was looking at her expectantly, waiting for her to continue.

"And…? I highly doubt that a hot little number like you has only slept with three women in your life."

"You want me to list everyone I've ever slept with?" Emily asked incredulously.

"If you're offering." Garcia grinned.

"I'm not." Emily replied firmly.

Garcia pouted for a minute and then another question occurred to her. "Have you ever slept with a guy?"

Emily rolled her eyes. She'd half expected Garcia to come up with that question. "Yes. One."

"And??? Who? When? Where? How was it?" Garcia inquired.

"And it was fine. It just…I knew it wasn't me. It was when I was young and foolish and trying to deny who I really was. As for the who: It's none of your business and you don't know him anyway.

JJ's mind was reeling. Emily had had sex with women. Several women. And a man. Garcia was asking ridiculously personal questions and Emily was actually answering them.

Emily glanced at JJ. She was still staring intently at her beer. "Something wrong with your beer Jayj?"

JJ looked up. "What? No. It's fine."

"Well then are you gonna drink it instead of just staring at it?" Garcia asked.

"Yeah. Sorry. I guess I'm on another planet today." JJ replied, taking a sip of her beer.

"Yeah. No kidding! Does this planet have a name?" Garcia inquired.

"Huh?" JJ was confused.

"I think what Garcia is asking, is who are you thinking about?" Emily explained.

"Yeah. Come on! Who is he?" Garcia persisted. "Or maybe, in light of recent revelations," she nodded in Emily's direction, "I should ask who is she?" Garcia wiggled her eyebrows and grinned and Emily couldn't help but laugh.

JJ blushed. She had been thinking about a she. She'd been thinking about Emily. Not romantically, obviously, but she'd been thinking about her none the less. She felt suddenly very self-conscious about this fact and found she didn't want to admit it. "Why do you automatically assume I was thinking about some_one_? Why couldn't I have been thinking about some_thing_?" She responded defensively as her mind raced to come up with something else she could have been thinking about.

Garcia raised an eyebrow and grinned. "Maybe this is my dirty mind talking here, but who's _thing_ were you thinking about?"

Emily laughed and JJ blushed deeper. Emily felt a pang of sympathy for her friend and decided to come to her rescue. "I don't think that that was quite what JJ meant, but I like the way your dirty mind works, Garcia."

"I was thinking about one of the case files I read today." JJ smiled at Emily for coming to her defense as it had also given her enough time to come up with an excuse for spaciness.

"Really? What?" Emily inquired, the profiler in her immediately interested in a potential case.

"No. Nuh-uh. No shop talk." Garcia interrupted. "We are at a bar, away from torture and dead bodies. I'd like to keep it that way."

JJ and Emily nodded. "Oh course my dear." Emily said.

"Oooh! What time is it?" Garcia asked, grabbing JJ's arm to look at her watch.

"Nine thirty." Emily replied, checking her phone. "Why?"

"I've gotta go meet Kevin!" Garcia said, chugging the rest of her beer and gathering her belongings.

"Ok, fine. Ditch us." Emily sulked. "Don't do anything I wouldn't do."

"Apparently that's a hell of a lot, so I don't think I'll be able to oblige." Garcia shot back. "See you ladies Monday." She said giving each woman a kiss on the cheek before heading to the door.

"Bye!" The two women called out in unison after her.

"Jinx, you owe me a beer." Emily said, downing the last few sips of the one she currently had.

JJ rolled her eyes, set down her own beer and headed to the bar. She ordered another two beers, figuring she'd probably have at least one more herself. As she waited for the bartender to get both her beers and her change, she couldn't help but glance back at the tall brunette she'd left at the table she felt her gaze strangely drawn to Emily. _What's with you tonight Jareau? _She asked herself as she turned back to the bar.

Emily watched JJ as she stood up at the bar. She really was an attractive woman. Emily wasn't sure if JJ was telling the truth about her mind being on a potential case or not. Sure, cases haunted all of them, and JJ even more so because the cases she turned down weighed heavily on her conscience. None the less, Emily had thought that JJ was distracted by something else. She'd seemed pretty normal before Emily had admitted she was gay. It wasn't like Emily'd been actively hiding this fact. It just hadn't really come up, and she'd been happy to keep her sexual orientation out of the workplace. She was kind of surprised that the profilers she worked with hadn't figured it out though. After all, her eyes did ten to linger ever so slightly on an attractive female. Emily actually suspected that Hotch might know, but he could be so hard to read, and he'd never say anything about it, so neither did she.

"Here is your beer." JJ said setting the glass in front of Emily.

"Thank you." Emily replied. "You got another one? You're only halfway done with your last one!"

"Yeah, well, I'm lazy. What can I say? I like making the least amount of trips to the bar possible." JJ grinned and Emily raised an eyebrow. She knew that the blonde was anything but lazy.

"So tell me about the case that you've been thinking about." Emily was asking both out of professional curiosity and to see if JJ really did have a case in mind.

"It's just this one in Clifton, New Jersey. Three young girls found raped, beaten, and murdered. All three were high school athletes. Strong girls who I just feel like should have been able to defend themselves. I dunno, something just seemed off about the case file and I can't even put my finger on it." This case had indeed lingered in JJ's mind earlier at work. She intended to bring it to Hotch's attention first thing Monday morning.

Emily was impressed. Maybe JJ really had been thinking about a case. _You're just being paranoid, thinking that once people know you're gay that that's all they'll think about!_ She scolded herself for doubting her friend. "I can read over it on Monday if you want." She offered.

"Well, I'm hoping that Hotch agrees that we should take the case in which case you'll all set to read over the case file."

"Ok." Emily was curious. She began running over the information that JJ had given her, already building a possible profile of the unsub.

JJ squirmed in her chair as the lull in the conversation dragged on. The questions that had been pestering her brain earlier, were still there. She cleared her throat and opened her mouth as if to speak.

Emily looked up. "Sorry. I guess I zoned."

JJ shrugged. "It's ok."

Emily examined JJ for a minute. "Were you gonna say something?" She asked curiously.

JJ shook her head. "No."

"You sure?"

"Yeah. It was nothing."

"What was nothing?" Emily raised one eyebrow.

"Nothing." JJ's mind raced as she searched for a topic to change the subject to.

"Nothing is nothing." Emily stated looking even more skeptically at JJ who nodded. "Oh good. Well I'm glad we cleared that up!" Emily rolled her eyes. "Come on! What's on your mind?" She coaxed.

JJ blushed. "I was wondering about things that are none of my business." JJ finally said, then she quickly gulped down some of her beer, partially to use the beer mug to hide her face behind.

_Maybe I wasn't so off-base._ Emily thought. "Like what?"

"Em, you're making it very difficult for me to not be nosy by encouraging me to ask questions that I have no business asking."

Emily grinned. _I was right!_ "Jayj, we're friends. Quite frankly, I was surprised you didn't ask any questions before. Ask away. If I don't want to answer, I won't."

JJ tried to think about which question was the most innocuous. She took another swig of beer. She suddenly felt like it was really stuffy in the bar. She needed air. She didn't know why, she just longed to go outside and breathe in the fresh, crisp fall air. Maybe then she wouldn't be so nervous about asking the questions she was wondering about. She glanced longingly at the door.

"You wanna go for a walk or something?" Emily asked, reading JJ's body language.

JJ nodded nervously. _Why am I nervous? It's Emily. Besides, she gave me permission to ask whatever I wanted!_

Emily looked longingly at the rest of her beer, then she looked up at her friend. JJ's face was flushed. Emily could tell she was uncomfortable and decided the air would do her good. She'd make JJ buy her another beer some other time. She grabbed her coat and guided JJ out of her seat and out the door of the bar. Once outside, JJ and Emily both slid their coats on. JJ relaxed a little as she breathed in the fresh air.

Emily studied JJ's face. _Why is she so nervous? _"I'm not that intimidating you know." She finally said.

JJ looked startled. "I know! You don't intimidate me! I just…I'm sorry. I don't know what's wrong with me. I'm just surprised, I guess."

Emily nodded. "Ok, so about your questions. Ask away."

"Ok. But you asked for it." JJ replied reluctantly. "When did you first realize you were gay?" JJ asked, beginning to pace.

"Would you like to walk as we talk?" Emily asked, JJ's nervousness unnerving her a little.

JJ nodded.

"Ok…when did I first realize I was gay…hmmm…I dunno. I kinda of always knew. But when was the first time I consciously thought about it? I'm not sure. Maybe in middle school when all the girls in my class were falling for Anthony Riesgo, and I had a crush on his sister Ashley." Emily replied thoughtfully.

JJ was surprised. _Don't be an idiot, Jayj. Just 'cause you didn't know 'til now, doesn't mean she just figured it out recently._

"Ok, next question?" Emily asked with a smile and a sidelong glance at JJ as they continued down the street.

JJ thought for a second. "I'm really not sure. I mean…I dunno. I guess…Ok…How old were you the first time you kissed a girl?"

"Well…what kind of a kiss are we talking about here?" Emily responded.

"I don't know. A kiss. I mean on the lips obviously." JJ squirmed.

"Ok, well I had my first peck on the lips with a girl with Ashley Riesgo as it turns out, eighth grade. My first kiss…and by that I mean no tongue, but a little more than a peck…that was when I was maybe fourteen or fifteen. Then my first real kiss with tongue with a girl…I was like nineteen. I spent most of high school trying to deny that I liked girls. It was just easier socially to pretend that I liked boys. And it's not like I don't appreciate a hot guy. I just have no desire to sleep with him."

JJ nodded. She could understand that.

"Ok, I think it's only fair that I get to ask you some questions too. Otherwise I have to do all the sharing, and I don't get to find out anything." Emily grinned.

JJ gulped and glanced nervously at Emily. She was never comfortable answering personal questions. She'd give Garcia vague recaps of her dates because there was no way of avoiding it, but other than that she was a fairly private person. Still, Emily was right. It wasn't fair that JJ got to ask a gazillion questions and Emily couldn't ask any. "Ok. What do you want to know?"

"How about the same question? When was your first kiss?" Emily asked.

"My first peck on the lips was when I was ten and my first real kiss, with tongue and all, was when I was fourteen. I went to a co-ed soccer camp that summer, and there was this really cute guy, and we ended up kissing after one of the bonfires. We dated for the rest of camp." JJ wasn't sure why she'd shared that last part.

Emily nodded thoughtfully. "Ever kissed a girl?"

JJ stumbled a little. "What?"

Emily grinned to herself. _Wow. She seems a little shaken by that question. I wonder why?_ "I'm not asking if your gay JJ. I'm just asking if you've ever kissed a girl. Lots of people experiment in college. Or do it for a dare…"

"I know." JJ tried to recover. "I um…I mean not really."

"Umm…I believe that answer requires an explanation, Jayj."

JJ sighed. "Like you said. In college I kissed one of my close friends. We were at a party and we'd been drinking and some guys wanted us to kiss and we kinda figured what the hell and we kissed. It was pretty chaste. No tongue." JJ's heart beat a little faster as she recalled the kiss. There hadn't been any tongue, but it had…well, she wasn't really sure. It certainly hadn't been a peck. And JJ had to admit that she'd enjoyed it. The girl's lips had been really soft. Softer than any of the guys she'd ever kissed. It hadn't been a big deal and they'd kinda blown it off afterwards, but every once and a while JJ found herself thinking about it.

Emily was kind of surprised. She had never thought that JJ would kiss a girl. Not that she thought JJ was a prude, she didn't. It was just…she couldn't picture it. She tried to and immediately wished she hadn't. It was a really hot image. Hotter than she'd expected having never viewed her colleague in a sexual manner before. She'd always been firm about that. She never looked at anyone she worked with sexually. That was her number one rule. She swallowed hard, putting the image of JJ kissing a girl out of her mind. "I see." She finally managed to say. "What's your next question?"

"Ok…um…that guy you slept with. How old were you?" JJ had been confused by Emily's reaction to her story about kissing a girl. She didn't think Emily had noticed, but she'd stopped dead in her tracks. Had she actually shocked Emily? If so, why?

"Seventeen. It was an embassy kid. He was a year older than me, and we were good friends. We kinda dated, and then I figured, what the hell, if anything was gonna prove to me that I was straight it would be sleeping with a guy. So I slept with him, and then I broke up with him a week later. I didn't come out right after that, but I think he knew anyway." Emily surprised herself at the detail she was going in to. JJ hadn't asked for that much information.

JJ just nodded. "So when did you come out?"

"A year later. I just told some close friends. I've never loudly broadcast the fact. I'm not ashamed of it. I just never felt that it was anyone else's business who I sleep with."

"Makes sense." JJ said. It did. _It's not as if I broadcast my sex life, and it's apparently a whole lot less interesting than Emily's._

"When was the first time you slept with a guy?" Emily asked. Surprised by how interested she was in the answer to this question.

JJ blushed a deep shade of red. "I…umm…" JJ cleared her throat. "I was fifteen and it was my best friend's older brother. Guess I should say ex best friend actually. It turns out she wasn't all that pleased about me sleeping with her brother. We'd been dating secretly and then during the second time we had sex my friend walked in on us and, yeah…she kinda exploded. She was so furious with us that she didn't talk to either of us for the rest of the year…and after that she only interacted with us if she had to. Her brother was great though. We dated all through high school. We broke up when we went to different colleges. We both decided it just made more sense. We loved each other, but we knew we weren't in love with each other, if you know what I mean. We still keep in touch actually. He's married now, and has three kids." _Way to over share JJ! She didn't ask for all of that information! Why are you rambling on? _

Emily smiled. _She's rambling. She only rambles when she's nervous. Why's she nervous? Is she possibly not as straight as she seems? Nah. Never. Still, she never shares this much! But hey, I'm not gonna complain! This is the most I've ever found out about Jennifer Jareau._ "And the first time you slept with a girl?" Emily winked.

JJ, on the other hand, choked on her own saliva. "What?" She asked in between coughs. "Never! I haven't! I don't…I mean…There's just…I haven't…"

"I'm kidding Jayj…Relax." Emily replied.

JJ laughed nervously.

"How about we call this Q and A session over for the night and we go back and have another beer?" Emily suggested.

JJ relaxed a little. "Sounds good." _Why're you being so weird JJ?_

Emily watched JJ as they turned and headed back towards the bar. _Why's JJ so nervous? Does she think I'm gonna start hitting on her now?_ "By the way, don't worry. I'm not gonna hit on you just 'cause I'm gay. You're not my type." Emily teased. She was slightly curious to see how JJ would react. _Yeah, cause gorgeous and successful isn't your type!_ A voice said sarcastically at the back of Emily's mind. _Colleagues aren't my type!_ She clarified firmly to herself.

Emily commented startled JJ and she tripped, falling over and hitting her knee painfully on the sidewalk. "Ow." She breathed in sharply.

Emily immediately knelt beside her. "You alright?"

"Yeah. I just hit my knee…I'll be fine." JJ replied. She looked up at Emily and felt her stomach tie in knots. "I didn't think…I knew you wouldn't hit on me."

Emily sighed. "Sorry. I was teasing. Here, let me see your knee."

JJ pulled up her pants leg. Her knee was scraped, but not bleeding badly. Emily rubbed her fingers over the scrape then began to feel around the rest of the knee, checking for any signs of swelling. "It doesn't look too bad. Did you twist it at all? Does this hurt?" She asked, pressing on the side.

"No. It's ok. It just stings a little." The knots in JJ's stomach tied tighter when Emily's hands touched her. _She's not hitting on you Jayj! Just relax. It's Emily. Same old Emily. Your friend._

Emily smiled at JJ. "Here. Let me help you up." She stood up and held out a hand to JJ, who took it. "Maybe you don't need another beer." Emily joked as JJ stood up.

JJ glared. "I'll have you know that I don't need any alcohol at all to trip and make a fool of myself." She joked.

Emily laughed. "JJ, you very rarely make a fool out of yourself. Come on, I'll buy you a beer." _Are you hitting on her, Em? No. You can't. Besides, it's JJ. You don't like JJ. You work with JJ._ She thought as the two headed back to the bar.


	2. Chapter 2

"We got a case." Hotch told Emily as she arrived at work on Monday morning. JJ was walking next to him; both were heading towards the conference room.

"The one you told me about?" Emily asked JJ.

JJ nodded. Despite her "all work" mentality, she felt her insides twist ever so slightly she'd been thinking about Emily all weekend, thinking about her own behavior on Friday night and how ridiculous she must have seemed. She felt embarrassed. _I acted like such an idiot!_

"Be there in a minute." Emily said, dropping her bag and heading to the break room to grab some much needed coffee. She glanced over her shoulder at JJ. _She looks really nice today. That purple top looks sooo good on her!_ She shook her head. _You will not fall for your colleague! Especially your straight colleague!_ Thoughts of JJ had entered Emily's head all weekend. Questioning JJ on Friday, it seemed, had awoken a curiosity about the blonde in Emily. She kept trying to shake the thoughts out of her head. The image of the cute blonde actually kissing another girl had really stayed with her. Annoyingly so. Emily sighed, taking a big gulp of her coffee and immediately wishing she hadn't as pain shot through her mouth. "Fuck!" She muttered as she breathed out. Still nursing her burnt mouth she headed for the conference room.

She was the last one into the room and JJ had already started going through the case. Hotch slid a file across the table to her as she took a seat. She opened it and caught herself up.

"And the third victim, Jessica Huntington, a junior at Clifton High School, and captain of the varsity lacrosse team. Found raped, beaten, and murdered on a quiet side street near a local bowling alley. According to local PD, the bowling alley is frequently used as a spot for drug deals, but there's no evidence that any of the girls used drugs, and none of the patrons of the bowling alley remembered seeing Jessica there."

Emily scanned through the crime scene pictures. All of the girls were young, attractive, and clearly fit. They wouldn't be easy targets. "Why would the unsub risk taking these girls? They're athletes. They're bound to fight back."

"Doesn't look like the M.E. found any trace under the victim's fingernails. Despite the multiple wounds, there's no direct evidence that they fought back. None of the usual defensive marks on the arms." Morgan said, flipping through the coroner's reports.

"Maybe the victims were sedated or unconscious during the beatings." Rossi suggested.

"Yeah, but they couldn't have been when they were first taken. How did they get close enough to sedate the girls or knock them unconscious to begin with?" JJ asked.

"The unsub could be someone that they knew." Morgan said.

"But where does he know them from? One was in public school and the other two were in two different private schools. One was catholic, one was Methodist, and one was Jewish so they didn't overlap at a place of worship. They all played different sports and went to different gyms." Emily scanned through the files.

"Well, we'll just have to find the overlap. If the unsub knew the victims, there has to be an overlap somewhere." Hotch said with a sigh.

The team continued to throw out theories, but got no further.

"The best thing we can do is get there and start talking to people." Hotch said finally.

"Wheels up in twenty minutes." JJ said before the team filed out of the room. She and Emily were the last to leave.

"Hey!" Emily said brightly to JJ as they walked down the hallway together.

"JJ smiled awkwardly back at her. "Hey."

"How was the rest of your weekend?" Emily asked.

"Fine," JJ lied. She could hardly admit that she'd spent a good part of the weekend mentally berating herself as she obsessively dissected their conversation Friday night.

Emily sensed that something was off with the blonde agent. "Really?" She looked skeptically at her friend.

JJ glanced at Emily. Emily was acting normal, comfortable. _Maybe she doesn't think I acted like an idiot._ JJ relaxed a little. She smiled more genuinely. "Yeah. It was uneventful. How about yours?"

"Also uneventful." Emily replied. _And I definitely didn't fantasize about you making out with a girl all weekend._ Emily looked sheepishly at JJ.

JJ saw her. "What?" She suddenly became really self-conscious.

Emily shook her head. "Nothing. I'm just out of it today."

JJ just nodded and the pair split as Emily headed to her desk and JJ headed to her office.

______________________

JJ somehow managed to be the last one on the plane. The fax she'd tried to send to the local sheriff's office to let them know they were coming had taken forever to go through.

Upon seeing that the rest of the team was on board, she told the pilot that they were ready to go, then she paused, looking around for where to sit. She saw Emily sitting alone towards the back of the plane and JJ felt inexplicably drawn to her. She hesitated for a second before heading to the back of the plane and taking a seat across from Emily.

Emily looked up from the file she'd been going through. When she saw who it was that had sat down across from her, she smiled. "Are you back for another round of twenty questions?" She asked.

JJ blushed. "No. Of course not! We're at work!" She said quietly.

Emily grinned at JJ's blush, which only made JJ blush deeper.

"Jayj…you're bright red right now." Emily teased.

JJ looked away, embarrassed. Emily, on seeing JJ's embarrassment couldn't help feeling a little bad. "JJ, come on. I was only teasing."

JJ continued to look out of the window, trying to get her blush under control.

"JJ, come on. It's not like you to react so strongly. What's wrong?" Emily's tone became more serious.

JJ glanced back at her friend, and seeing the concern there, she relented. "I just…I feel like I made a fool out of myself on Friday, and then earlier you didn't mention it so I thought maybe you'd forgotten or something so I relaxed, but then you bring it up here on the plane with the rest of the team around."

Emily was surprised. She hadn't thought that JJ had made a fool out of herself at all, and she proceeded to tell her that. "Jayj, you were just being curious. That's a natural reaction." Emily said in a low, comforting tone. She leaned forward and took JJ's hand that was sitting on the table. She wanted to make sure that she had JJ's full attention. She could tell that JJ didn't believe her. "JJ, I mean it. You didn't make a fool out of yourself at all."

JJ just stared at her hand in Emily's. The touch had sent a tingle down her spine.

"Jayj." Emily said a little louder, trying to capture the blonde's attention. _Why is she staring at my hand? _

JJ finally looked up into Emily's eyes. Emily saw a flash of…what was it…Desire? …Curiosity? Something cross JJ's face. It was gone in a second and Emily questioned that it had been there at all. "JJ, are we good? I don't want things to be weird between us. You can ask me more questions whenever you want. And you don't have to answer any if you don't want to. But you definitely won't make a fool out of yourself for asking questions. Ok?"

JJ nodded. "Yeah. Ok. And I do have to answer questions if I ask you more. It's only fair."

"Hey there love birds." Morgan teased, taking a seat next to Emily. JJ pulled back her hand like it'd been bitten by a snake.

"We're not…I'm not…" JJ stumbled. _Lovebirds? What was he talking about?_

"Oh yeah. Very mature. Two adult women can't touch each other without being into each other right?" Emily rolled her eyes at Morgan.

"Well…you know most guys do fantasize about that." Morgan grinned.

"Well, yep! You caught us. Here we are, having a secret love affair on an airplane full of profilers. We didn't think that anyone would notice."

Morgan laughed. "Ok, ok…I guess not." Morgan looked across the table at JJ. She looked pale. "You ok JJ? This case is getting to you already, huh?" He asked understandingly.

She nodded yes, but in truth it was Emily's words. She knew that Emily was being sarcastic, but something in what she'd said had made JJ feel…well, weird inside.

Emily looked speculatively at her friend. She didn't think it was the case that was causing the paleness in the young blonde agent. _The sexy blonde agent._ She couldn't help but think. _JJ's acting nervous, not concerned about a case. She's reacting to Morgan, and to me. She wasn't nearly so pale until Morgan suggested the idea that we were together. Either she's slightly homophobic, which I doubt, or she's unsure of her own sexuality. Could it be? Could JJ really be gay? Or bi? _It seemed improbable, but Emily was starting to think that maybe, just maybe, her friend wasn't quite as straight as everyone thought she was.

Emily brushed her leg against JJ's under the table and she watched her reaction. JJ's breath caught and she glanced at Emily. Emily raised an eyebrow. That was not the reaction of a straight friend. A straight friend wouldn't have noticed the leg brush, or would have written it off as unimportant.

Emily's raised eyebrow made JJ swallow hard. _Oh God. Did she notice my reaction? Is she profiling me? No…no…it doesn't matter. What could my reaction have shown? It definitely didn't show that I was just sitting here thinking about her…thinking…no, more like wondering…what it might be like to kiss her. And why the hell was I wondering that to begin with? What's wrong with you JJ? You like guys. You always have. I mean ok you've always kinda admired women and noticed them, especially when they're gorgeous like Emily is, but that doesn't mean anything. It's not like you had crushes on them…right? And just cause you liked that kiss in college…it doesn't mean anything! She was just a good kisser._ While part of her accepted those conclusions, there was another part of her that was aware of the fact that she'd fantasized about that kiss for months afterwards; that part of her had wanted the kiss to be a "real kiss," a kiss with tongue…that part of her wanted that kiss to happen again. JJ cleared her throat and looked out the window.

Emily had watched the display of emotion on JJ's face. JJ was certainly confused about something, and Emily had a pretty good idea about what.

___________________________

"Hi, I'm Agent Jareau. We spoke on the phone. This is SSA Hotchner. He's the head of our team." JJ introduced herself to the local sheriff.

"Welcome to New Jersey." Sheriff Pratt replied as he shook hands with the team members. "Thank you for coming."

"I hope we can help. Would it be possible to get one of your deputies to take some of my team to talk to the parents?" Hotch requested.

"Yeah. Sure. But if you really wanna know these girls I advice talking to their coaches and their teammates." Sheriff Pratt suggested.

JJ nodded. "Hotch, he's right." She said to him quietly. She knew from her days playing soccer that her teammates always had a much better idea of what was going on in her life than her parents did.

"Ok. Reid, you and Morgan go talk to the parents. Rossi and I will talk to the coaches. JJ, Prentiss, why don't you two talk to some of the girls' teammates." Hotch delegated.

JJ glanced at Emily and swallowed hard. "Sure. We're on it."

She and Emily headed away from the group. JJ glanced at her watch. It was almost three in the afternoon. "If we head over to the schools now, we should catch the girls starting practice."

"Great. Which school should we hit up first?"

"Well, Holy Cross lets out first. Probably there." JJ said.

"Sounds good. Let's go." Emily smiled at her, as they headed for their SUV.

JJ smiled back unconsciously. Emily grinned even wider at that. She held the door open for JJ as they left the precinct, and couldn't help but take a moment to observe the petite blonde as she walked past her. She had to admit, JJ was pretty hot. _Ok, even if she isn't as straight as she thinks she is, you still can't hit on her. You can't date someone you work with. Besides, if she is figuring out she's gay or bi she needs a friend, not someone who's interested in her._

Emily unlocked the SUV and climbed into the driver's seat as JJ slid into the passenger seat. "Ready?" Emily asked with a glance at JJ.

"Yep." JJ replied. She glanced at Emily, but when she found her eyes focusing on Emily's lips, she looked away quickly. _Just look out the window and focus on the case. Quit being weird JJ!_ She thought to herself as Emily started the car and they drove off.


	3. Chapter 3

"Jess was awesome! I can't believe she's gone! We're definitely gonna lose against Lakewood next week now! There was no way she did drugs either! I don't care where they found her!" A young brunette was addressing JJ and Emily. JJ was trying to listen to the lamenting of the teammates, but it had been the same routine at the other schools. She couldn't help thinking about playing soccer back in high school and college. She couldn't imagine what she'd have done if one of her teammates had been murdered. They were like sisters to her. All of them. Some of Jessica's teammates seemed to have no real connection with their dead friend. Some seemed much more interested in the media circus that was now surrounding the school. A young blonde off to her right caught her attention. She seemed more upset than the others somehow. Her face was long and thin and she paled visibly at the subject of Jessica. JJ approached her, leaving Emily to deal with the rest of the teammates.

"Hey. You ok?" she asked softly.

The young girl nodded, though red-rimmed eyes brimming with tears told otherwise.

"Were you and Jessica close?"

The girl nodded.

"What's your name?" JJ prodded the girl.

"Lynn," the girl muttered so softly that JJ almost missed it.

"Lynn, do you know anyone who could have done this to Jessica? Did she have any boyfriends? Anyone new in her life? Even a stranger she noticed lurking around? Or someone you got a bad vibe from even?"

Lynn hesitated then shook her head.

"Did anything happen recently? Anything out of the ordinary at all? Was there anything going on in Jessica's life that was new in any way?" JJ persisted.

Lynn bit her lower lip.

"Whoever killed Jessica has also killed two other girls. We need to catch him, and if you know anything, even if it seems unimportant, it could help."

Lynn blanched at the mention of murder. She glanced hesitantly at the coach then turned back to JJ. "She rolled her ankle a couple of weeks ago. She didn't want to stop playing so coach sent her to a private orthopedist who didn't charge her and she never told her folks. I don't know who he was or anything, but…I mean why wouldn't he charge? And coach hasn't mentioned her injury to anyone. I think 'because he's scared he'll lose his job if the school finds out he was pushing star athletes to play on injuries."

JJ glanced at the coach. She'd need to talk to him. Either the coach or the doctor could be a suspect. None of the other victim's teammates had mentioned injury, but maybe they were in the dark, or protecting their own. It was clear that Lynn was hesitant to share this information even now. "Thank you. That is very helpful. You're doing your friend a real service speaking up." JJ patted the girl reassuringly.

"Are you going to catch him?" Lynn turned scared blue eyes to JJ.

"Yes. I promise." JJ nodded assuredly.

"She didn't to drugs," Lynn added.

"I didn't think she did. We're trained to look beyond what the situation appears to be. Thank you for talking to me." JJ stood and tried to catch Emily's eye, indicating that the needed to talk.

Emily approached JJ and the two wondered away from the girls and the coach. "Please tell me you got something more useful than that none of the teammates wanted her dead because they need her to win the game next week."

"I think I do. Lynn there," JJ nodded at the young blonde, "said that Jessica was injured. Normally she'd have to sit out a few games, but the coach didn't want that so recommended that she go see a doctor who didn't charge her or the insurance."

"Sketchy. Sounds like we need to bring in the coach for questioning. And the doctor too if the coach gives him up," Emily agreed.

"The coach wouldn't know the other two victims though. And none of the other victims' teammates mentioned anything about an injury," JJ pointed out.

"True, but they might have thought they were protecting their dead teammates. They might have not wanted to betray them," Emily said.

"True," JJ conceded. "Cuffing the coach in front of the team is not going to endear us to them. We should ask him if he'd be willing to come down to the station to help us out more."

"Good plan. Let's go talk to the coach," Emily replied as she strode back towards the man in question.

__________________________________

"We know she was injured. The ME confirmed she had a torn ligament in her right ankle. We need to know what doctor you sent her to." Hotch insisted to Coach Flannigan.

"She didn't tell me about the injury. She must have gone off and found some doctor on her own. If she'd been injured, I wouldn't have scheduled her to play!" the coach replied defensively.

"You're a coach. You notice everything about your team members," JJ said calmly and coldly.

"I can't help it if she didn't tell me!" Coach Flannigan insisted.

"You didn't notice a limp? Apparently the injury happened at practice. Also we have a witness who says that you recommended a doctor who wouldn't charge her," Hotch tossed out nonchalantly. "Now if you don't help us find that doctor, we might start to wonder if you had something to do with Jessica's death. On the other hand, if you cooperate, we'll probably look the other way about you encouraging players to play on injuries."

The coach seemed to consider this for a minute. "I suggested she look into some doctors who do pro bono work for promising athletes. That's all. I didn't give her a name. I don't know who she found."

"That's not overly helpful. How do we know that you're not protecting the doctor because you were involved in the murder?" JJ asked.

"No! I didn't. I…I know that Dr. Martin Greeley takes some pro bono patients. That's all I know! I swear!" Coach Flannigan gave in.

Hotch turned to JJ and nodded. JJ left the interrogation room and approached Emily. "Let's go see a doctor."

_________________________________

"I'm sorry, but I have no patient in my records by the name of Jessica Huntington," Dr. Greeley repeated for the third time.

"You ever see any patients off the record?" Emily suggested.

"No, of course not!" The anger in Dr. Greeley's voice was starting to show.

"How about some pro bono work?" JJ interjected.

"That's what free clinics are for," Dr. Greeley scowled at the two agents standing in his office.

"That' not exactly what we heard. Coach Flannigan told a different story," Emily informed Dr. Greeley nonchalantly.

Dr. Greeley's face tightened in recognition. "That son of a…" he scowled.

"I take it you know him?" Emily asked.

"Not well," Dr. Greeley replied.

"Well enough that he knows about your practice of taking patients without charging them," JJ pointed out.

Dr. Greeley grimaced. "I'm not the guy you're looking for. I didn't treat Jessica Huntington or any of the other girls, and I certainly didn't kill anyone. I'm not the only doctor in town who is benevolent enough to take on patients free of charge. If I were you, I'd be taking a look at Dr. Edmund Montgomery."

"Ok. Thank you for your help. We'll look into it." Emily smiled sweetly before turning on her heels and rolling her eyes.

"Thank you for your help," JJ said before turning and leaving the office with Emily.

"Does he seem overly benevolent to you?" Emily asked skeptically.

"Not really," JJ replied.

Emily glanced sidelong at JJ. "You know, we make a good team."

JJ felt her stomach begin to tie into knots. "Yeah."

Emily linked her arm through JJ's. "I guess we need to go talk to another doctor."

JJ felt her heart skip a beat when Emily touched her. Her breathing quickened slightly. "Yeah," she replied, breathier than before.


	4. Chapter 4

JJ and Emily had no luck locating Dr. Montgomery. He wasn't at his office, his house, or his ex-wife's house. By the time JJ and Emily finished trying to locate him, it was too late to head back to the station, so they went to the hotel instead. Hotch met them outside, despite the steady rain that had begun to drizzle down. His face was grave. "We've got another victim. Teammate of Jessica Huntington." Hotch looked at a piece of paper he'd written down. "Lynn Gilbert."

JJ's world froze. How was that possible? The young blonde that she'd been talking to earlier was now dead? How…Why….

"Jayj? You ok?" Emily asked her friend.

JJ walked away without replying. She hadn't even heard Emily. _What if me talking to her got her killed? She was so young! She couldn't have been more than seventeen! And she was an athlete! And now she's dead…_

Emily looked to Hotch. "I think that might be the girl JJ interviewed earlier. The one who told us about the doctor and the coach's recommendation."

"You stay here with JJ. I'll go with Morgan to the crime scene, and I think Rossi and Reid need to have another little chat with the coach," Hotch told her.

"Ok."

"Take care of JJ. I think she's taking this case harder than any of us. She's relating too closely to the victims," Hotch instructed.

"Yeah. I know what you mean. Don't worry. I've got her," Emily assured him. Emily gazed after her friend who was walking along the street, apparently unaware of the rain showering down on them harder and harder by the minute. Emily glanced towards the warm and welcoming hotel where she not only had a rain jacket, but she was pretty sure there was a bed calling her name. She turned somewhat reluctantly and headed after JJ.

JJ was in a daze. All she could think about was that young innocent face looking up into hers and asking if they'd catch the guy. JJ had promised that they would, but Lynn was dead now. They hadn't caught the bastard fast enough. JJ wasn't aware of where she was walking. She didn't care. She just needed to walk, to get away. She was vaguely aware of Emily coming up besides her, but she ignored her. She walked on.

"JJ," Emily tried to get her friend's attention.

JJ didn't want to deal with Emily. For the moment, all of the confusing emotions of the past couple of days had drained away. JJ's only focus was a building rage. A rage at the bastard who'd killed Lynn and Jessica and the two other girls. A rage at herself for not being able to stop it.

Emily could see that JJ was angry. She knew that the blonde was most likely feeling some guilty, and Emily knew that she needed to stop that from worsening. "JJ!" she tried again.

JJ kept walking, oblivious to the rain that slid down her face and drenched her clothing. Emily shivered as a cold drop of water slid down her spine. "JJ!" she said louder, grabbing JJ by the elbow and spinning her around to face her.

"What?" JJ yelled back at her. "What?" she repeated as tears began to stream down her face.

"It's not your fault," Emily told her, staring straight into deep blue eyes.

JJ just shook her head as her tears and the rain fell down her face.

"JJ, it's not your fault!" Emily reiterated, shaking the younger woman.

"I told her we'd catch him!"

"And we will!" Emily assured her.

JJ just shook her head again. She didn't want to deal with this. She couldn't right now. And why did it have to be Emily coming after her? Emily was making her so confused. "Why'd you come after me?"

Emily was taken aback by the question. "What do you mean why did I come after you? You're my friend JJ and I know you're upset."

"I just want to be alone right now. I can't deal with you or with that. I'm sorry."

"With me? With what? JJ, just talk to me!" Emily was now so focused on JJ that she too had forgotten all about the downpour they were caught in.

"I can't!" JJ yelled in frustration. "I can't talk to you!"

"Why not?"

"Because!"

"Oh that's good JJ! Very articulate of you!" Emily shot back with sarcasm. She just wanted JJ to talk to her, to let her help.

"Because you're you! And that's confusing me! And I can't deal with that right now because there are four dead girls and their killer is still out there! A killer that I promised to catch!"

"JJ we will catch him! All of us! The team! We'll get him!" Emily told her. "And what do you mean because I'm me? What about me? Why are you confused?" Emily knew at least one of those answers, but she wanted JJ to say it.

"Because before this weekend there were thoughts in my head that I'd managed to shove away, but ever since you told me…I just haven't been able to stop thinking about it! And maybe if I had been thinking about that less and the case more, maybe I'd have seen something that I missed, and we'd have the guy in custody right now and Lynn would still be alive!"

"You don't know that! He'd probably still be out there JJ! And what are you thinking about? What can't you stop thinking about?" Emily demanded.

"You! Are you kidding? You! And…and…not being straight! And…I dunno…kissing that girl in college! And girls in general! And I don't know! Stuff I shouldn't be thinking about!"

"Like what?" Emily was still holding on to JJ's arm and was staring straight into her eyes.

JJ gazed up into Emily's dark brown eyes and lost the small remainder of her control. "Like this…" she replied barely above a whisper and she pulled Emily in for a kiss. JJ felt like her lips were on fire as they met Emily's.

Emily was stunned at first. She didn't respond immediately. When she realized what was happening, she began to kiss back intensely. _This isn't right. This isn't the time._

JJ's brain kicked into gear simultaneously to Emily's. _What are you doing? Are you insane? You're straight! You're on a case! A young girl is dead tonight!_ JJ pulled away and Emily let her.

"JJ…" Emily started to say, but JJ cut her off.

"No. I can't deal with this right now. I just need to go for a walk. On my own."

Emily nodded. "Ok. But when you come back to the hotel, please, please stop by my room. Ok?"

"I can't promise that," JJ replied.

"Yes you can. If for no other reason than so that I know that you're back safely. Ok? Please?"

JJ nodded then turned and kept walking. Emily stared after her, half wanting to run and catch up with her, half knowing that JJ needed the space and the time. Her mind went to the kiss they'd just shared. What had that been…really? Was JJ just confused about her sexuality so kissing her was just an experiment? Was JJ actually developing feelings for her? Or was JJ just so caught up in the intensity of the moment that the kiss happened? Emily wasn't sure, but from what JJ had been saying, she didn't think it was the last option. Another shiver reminded Emily that she was standing out in the pouring rain. With one last glance at JJ she headed back to the hotel. _You have to talk to her…help her. She's lost and confused and needs a friend more than anything, so be that friend and be there for her._


	5. Chapter 5

JJ's brain swam with images, none of them the rain soaked grass that was actually in front of her. She shivered as rain slid down her spine and the crime scene pictures of the victims flashed before her eyes. She remembered the face of Lynn, the look of hope in her eyes when JJ had told her that they'd catch the bastard who had killed her friend. Now she was dead, gone…She'd never know when they caught him. JJ kicked the ground, mud squelching around her shoe as it got stuck. JJ pulled her foot angrily, but her shoe wouldn't budge. She pulled her foot out, kicked off her other shoe, and kept walking. She ignored the mud squishing between her toes and the rain that had already drenched her from head to toe. She could only focus on the case, on Lynn, and on how stupid she'd just been with Emily. What in the world had possessed her to kiss Emily?

_You're not gay! Emily's gay, but you're not! And Emily's your colleague! How stupid can you be? Lynn's dead and you're just making the situation worse by kissing people you work with!! Now Emily might not be able to do her job as well because she'll be worried about you being crazy! And you know you'll be all weird around her now! So now you'll do a worse job! And Lynn doesn't deserve that! What's wrong with you???_

JJ knew, somewhere in her brain, that she should head back towards the hotel. If she wasn't back when Hotch got back, they'd worry about her. They didn't need to be worrying about her. They needed to be focusing on catching the asshole killer. None the less, JJ couldn't convince her feet to turn around and go back. She kept walking straight through the large park, ignoring the darkness, and the rain, and the mud…Ignoring anything besides her miserable thoughts.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Where's JJ?" Hotch asked Emily as he strode into the hotel lobby.

"What? Um…She's…I…She went for a walk," Emily replied. She'd been thinking about JJ nonstop since she left.

"In the rain?" Hotch asked.

"Yeah," Emily confirmed.

Hotch sat down next to Emily. "Do we need to take her off of this case? Is she going to be able to handle it?"

Emily looked at Hotch. "She can do it. She wouldn't let you pull her off it," Emily responded.

Hotch considered this for a second then nodded. "You're probably right. How long ago did she go on the walk?"

Emily shrugged. "Right after you guys left."

"Emily, that was almost three hours ago!" Hotch's voice rose in alarm.

"Really?" Emily felt like she'd been in a daze the past three hours. Time didn't seem to be moving at a normal speed. She was too wrapped up in her thoughts…in thoughts of JJ.

"Emily we need to go find her!" Hotch stood rapidly and began heading for the door.

"I'll go, Hotch," Emily volunteered. "Let me go get her. I have a vague idea of the direction she was heading."

"I'll come with you," Hotch said.

"No. Really. It's alright," Emily tried to dissuade him.

"Neither of you should be out there by yourselves," Hotch attempted to persuade Emily.

"Hotch, we're strong, we're smart, we'll be fine. Just let me go get her," Emily said.

Hotch examined Emily for a second. Something more was going on that he wasn't aware of, but he had to trust his team. "Ok. Go."

Emily stood and walked as quickly to the door to the hotel as she thought she could without alarming Hotch. As she stepped outside into the drizzle, she realized that she should probably go back inside to grab a rain jacket or an umbrella in order to allay any suspicions Hotch might get. On the other hand she really wanted to find JJ, so she ignored the rain and pressed on. She peered through the drizzle as she headed off in the direction that she'd watched JJ wander off in almost three hours before. If something had happened to her, Emily knew it would be her fault. She'd pushed JJ too hard, and hadn't been the supportive friend that she knew JJ needed right now.

"JJ!" she tried calling out in the drizzly darkness. She got no response. Emily's senses were acutely aware as she got further and further away from the hotel and headed into the deeper darkness of the nearby park. Every noise outside of the rain peeked her interest and made her look around. Emily kept walking. She passed a young couple, who seemed blissfully unaware of the rain as they walked hand-in-hand gazing lovingly into each other's eyes as he held an umbrella over the two of them. They quickly disappeared into the rain and the darkness.

Emily peered into the darkness, looking for any signs of JJ. She had no idea if she was even still on the same path that JJ had taken. JJ could have turned and walked in any direction. Emily gritted her teeth and kept walking, kept peering through the gloom. Ten minutes later, Emily stumbled over something in the mud. Emily looked down and her heart froze: JJ's shoes. Emily examined the area…Muddy footprints indicated that JJ walked on from there. "JJ!" she called again. Silence greeted her ears. "Come on JJ! Where are you?" Emily muttered to herself. Emily kept walking, at least now feeling like she was headed in the right direction as she followed the footprints.

Every once and a while she'd call out JJ's name, but each time she'd get no response. After what felt like hours, but in actuality Emily knew was only another half an hour or so, Emily saw a figure in the distance. "JJ!"

The figure didn't move. Emily moved closer and saw that the shadowy figure was indeed the blonde media liaison. Emily stood for a second watching her, wondering what the best way to approach her might be. She approached cautiously and slowly, giving JJ every chance to turn around, but she didn't. Emily reached out and took JJ's hand as she came up even with her.

JJ jumped and turned to see who it was who'd taken her hand. When she recognized Emily, she relaxed a little and squeezed Emily's hand. JJ had stopped by a pond. She had been gazing at the patterns the rain played on across the surface of the pond for the past several hours as she went over everything that had happened in the past couple of days. She'd gone over everything relating to Emily that had happened and had concluded that she couldn't let weirdness between them ruin the case. She'd also gone over every minute detail of the case she could remember, over and over and over again. She'd been looking for anything she might have overlooked…something that seemed minute and unimportant but might actually break the case. She didn't know, but she was leaning towards the mysterious doctor. She remembered the time in high school that she'd rolled her ankle a week before one of the biggest games of the season against their biggest rivals. She'd wrapped it and taped it and run on it for the whole week so that her coach wouldn't find out and she wouldn't be taken out of the game. As a result, she'd exacerbated the injury and had had to be taken out of the game ten minutes in. She'd also missed the remaining three weeks of the season while she underwent physical therapy. If she'd been able to get medical care for free, without alarming her folks or her coach, she'd have taken it.

"How you doing?" Emily asked in concern.

JJ shrugged. "How long have I been gone?"

"Almost three hours. Hotch is back," Emily informed her.

"Shit! I meant to be back before then. Did he say anything? Anything about Lynn?"

Emily shook her head. "No. But we should get back. I'm sure he's got information for us."

JJ nodded. "Yeah." She didn't move.

_So she's not going to bring it up? _Emily wondered. _We can't have this between us. We need to talk about it. _"JJ…"

JJ knew what was coming. "I'm sorry I kissed you. I don't know what it was, but we need to focus on the case. I need to catch this bastard."

"You will. We will," Emily assured her. "I just wanted to tell you, that…I understand when weird things happen in the heat of the moment in intense situations. I didn't…I'm not reading anything into it. I'm your friend. If you want to talk…if you need to…I'm here. I'll listen. Always."

JJ squeezed Emily's hand again. "Thanks."

Emily let go of JJ's hand and put her arm around her shoulders. "You're drenched."

JJ looked around in surprise. "Oh…Yeah."

"Come on," Emily said as she steered JJ back towards the hotel.

They walked back mostly in silence. JJ was comforted by Emily's presence. The weirdness that she'd been expecting wasn't there. It was as if they'd both come to the realization that nothing mattered right now except for solving this case. Anything else could be worked out later.

By the time they walked into the hotel lobby, half an hour later, the rest of the team was back and both Emily and JJ were drenched with rain.

"Woah! Look at you two sporting the 'drowned rat' look! I think it suits you!" Morgan teased.

Hotch shot him a look that indicated that this was not the time and rushed towards them. "Are you both ok?"

"We're fine," Emily answered for the both of them.

"You two go get dry and changed and meet us back out here in a bit," Hotch ordered them.

Emily nodded, but JJ didn't budge.

"What did you find out?" JJ asked.

Hotch glanced down and took in JJ's barefoot, mud coated feet. "Go clean up and then I'll tell you everything."

JJ hesitated, but Emily's strong arm still around her shoulder steered her across the lobby and down the hall.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Half an hour later, after a hot shower, JJ was feeling slightly more human, but no less focused. Dressed in warm clothes and new shoes she headed out to the lobby, where Emily and the rest of the team were already waiting for her.

"Better?" Emily asked her.

JJ nodded. "Hotch, what did you find out?"

"This was a different killer," Hotch informed her.

"You're sure?" JJ asked in disbelief.

"Whoever killed Lynn was not an experienced killer. He also showed remorse. He placed the body in a peaceful pose, and closed the eyes. There were fingerprints in blood on both lids. It shouldn't take long to get an ID if he's in the system," Morgan explained.

"This was a rage killing. Plain and simple. Followed up with the regret. The man who killed Lynn is by no means a career criminal. He's not a serial killer," Rossi added.

"The coach," JJ said confidently. She didn't know why, but she was surer of that than she was anything else. "Her coach killed her."

"Why?" Reid asked.

"He was encouraging girls to play on injuries so that they wouldn't hurt their record. Lynn told me that, he got dragged in, questioned by the FBI…I'm guessing the school found out too and he lost his job or at least got strongly reprimanded," JJ attempted to explain her rational for this conclusion.

"That's true. And from what I observed in him, that would be enough to cause rage…probably enough to cause him to kill," Emily added.

Hotch nodded. "I'll go bring him in." Hotch nodded to Morgan and the two men headed out to the cars.

Rossi approached Emily and JJ. "You two feeling alright? I think maybe you should get some sleep."

JJ shook her head. "I'm fine. I want to be there when you interrogate this guy."

Rossi hesitated. "I don't know that that's such a good idea."

"I need to be there," JJ reiterated.

Emily put a hand on Rossi's arm. "She'll be fine."

Rossi examined Emily, and then turned his gaze back to JJ. "Ok," he relented. "Let's head to the station then."


	6. Chapter 6

"They're so perfect. So perfect in every way. Of course I had to fix them when they came to me, to make them perfect again. But how could I charge to restore them to their glory? I couldn't! But then…then…" Dr. Edmund Montgomery snarled then, almost oblivious to the profilers who sat across from him.

JJ was watching Rossi and Morgan's interrogation through the glass. She could barely stomach his account from where she was, but if she'd been in the room with him, she knew that she would have been unable to control herself.

"Well, seems Greeley's tip was spot on," Emily muttered beside her.

JJ moved unconsciously closer to the comfort that Emily seemed to provide her.

"I restored them to their brilliance…to their perfection and all I wanted was to be able to touch that perfection. To taste it. Just once. But would they listen to my reasoning? Would they even deem to consider someone as imperfect as me?" Montgomery's scowl was piercing. "I was just their doctor."

"It's amazing how much reverence and disdain he manages to get into the same sentence," Emily commented.

JJ just nodded silently, anger burning her up inside. He was the murderer and he was indirectly the cause of poor Lynn's death as well.

"Jayj," Emily murmured softly, taking in her friend's stiff posture and stone cold expression. She put a hand gingerly on her arm. "Why don't we go for a walk?" she suggested.

JJ shook her head, but Emily put her arm firmly around her waist and began to lead her from the room anyway. Out in the hallway of the precinct JJ found that she felt like she could breathe more easily.

"Come on. Let's get out of here," Emily continued to lead her down the hallway to the exit.

JJ followed, still feeling numb, as Emily headed to one of the department issued SUV's and climbed in the driver's side. Emily waited patiently while JJ climbed into the passenger's seat, then started to drive. She headed for the park where JJ had taken a walk in the rain to nights before. JJ tried protesting mildly as they got further away from the police station, but to no avail.

"The team needs us there."

"No they don't," Emily replied. "They're doing fine without us."

JJ sighed, looking out the window. Emily was right, and if she was honest with herself, JJ knew that she didn't really want to go back there.

Emily pulled into a parking place near the park and got out. She waited expectantly as JJ extracted herself from the seatbelt and followed her out of the car. Emily began walking, knowing that JJ would fall into step beside her.

"We got him," she said softly after a few minutes of silence. "You kept your promise to Lynn."

JJ nodded and closed her eyes, feeling the warmth of the sun on her face. Here in the park during the day she could hear birds twittering in the trees and children's laughter drifted over to her from a nearby playground. It was almost easy to pretend that the evil that they'd left behind at the precinct was a dream. She knew it wasn't though.

"Say something?" Emily pleaded, as she was really beginning to worry about JJ.

"It seems surreal that this world can coexist with that one," JJ muttered, as much to herself as to anyone else.

Emily knew what she meant. "Yeah. It does. But this world's existence is what keeps us going into that one, to fight it, to make sure that it doesn't overshadow this one."

JJ nodded again. "True." Suddenly it seemed to JJ as if a cloud had lifted. She looked around, really taking in the sights, sounds, and smells around her. This was what the job was about: protecting days like this, people like those around them, people like the one standing right next to her. "True," she repeated.

Emily could see the change in JJ as soon as it occurred. Suddenly her stance wasn't so defeated, and her eyes twinkled brighter.

"You're wrong about something though," JJ said after a few minutes of walking.

Emily was surprised. "Oh yeah? What?"

"It's not no strings attached," JJ stated plainly. She didn't know what about the bright, sunny day emboldened her to admit that, but it felt right.

"What?" Emily was puzzled. She felt like she'd come into a conversation halfway through.

JJ didn't respond though. She didn't really feel like explaining.

Emily racked her brain, trying to figure out what JJ had meant. "_It's not no strings attached." What does that mean? _

JJ kept walking.

Emily stopped cold as the conversation from the day before flooded back to her.

JJ turned when she noticed the sudden absence of Emily from her side. One look was all it took for JJ to know that Emily had figured out what she'd meant. JJ sighed and took a few steps back towards her.

"JJ, what do you mean that it's not no strings attached?" Emily asked urgently. She wanted to make sure that she and JJ were on the same page.

JJ shrugged.

"You mean between you and me?" Emily prompted.

JJ shrugged again.

"You mean the kiss?" Emily lowered her voice, but the urgency in it stayed.

JJ didn't respond, but she dropped her eyes, and Emily knew that she was right.

"Why are there strings attached to the kiss?" Emily asked, trying to sound calm. She didn't want to pressure JJ. She didn't want to jump to conclusions, to get her hopes up, before she knew where JJ was coming from.

"Can we talk about this back in D.C.?" JJ asked, suddenly uncomfortable as she noticed the other people around them.

Emily took a deep breath and reminded herself that the purpose of this excursion away from the precinct was for JJ's mental health, and that pressing this would probably defeat that purpose. "Sure," she managed to smile.

JJ began walking again and Emily fell back into step beside her. They were headed for the same pond that a few nights before Emily had found JJ by. It too looked different in the daylight as a dog bounded into it on its way to recover a tennis ball.

When they reached the pond, JJ stopped, looking out over the water. "Thanks. I don't think I've said that yet."

Emily was again taken by surprise. "For what?"

"For being my friend. For not pushing things. For being there when I needed to talk about this case…and…other things."

Emily took JJ's hand that was lying limply at her side, and turned her so that she could look into her face. "You're welcome. I'm just glad that I can be there for you."

"Me too," JJ agreed with a warm smile.

Emily smiled back. She found it impossible not to. JJ looked so radiantly beautiful with the sunlight shining on her, that Emily knew that she would be putty in JJ's hands if JJ asked anything of her.

"We should head back. I'm sure they're done with the interrogation by now. Hotch will wonder where we are," JJ said.

Emily nodded. "You're probably right."

They turned in unison and began to head back to the car, JJ left her hand in Emily's. Neither of them thought about it until they got to the car and they were forced to pull their hands apart. JJ blushed and Emily couldn't help feeling sheepish.

"Back to reality," JJ mumbled as she climbed into the SUV.

Emily nodded her agreement. The sunny park had felt idyllic. Now it was back to the real world.

_____________________________________________________________________________________________

Everyone was silent on the ride back. Morgan had his earphones on, listening to music to drown out the thoughts in his head. Reid was reading a book that he'd read before and knew word for word, but he found it comforting, so he read anyway. Rossi mused over his notes for the next book he was planning, making changes here and there and writing down an idea when one occurred to him. Hotch stared out of the window, regretting the lives that he couldn't save and trying to focus on Jack who he'd get to see that weekend.

Emily and JJ sat across from each other both looking out the window, sneaking furtive glances at each other. Emily caught JJ's eyes on her during one glance and couldn't restrain her grin. She felt almost giddy at the possibility of what JJ might have been suggesting in the park.

JJ felt Emily's leg brush against hers under the table between them and her breath caught. She remembered the plane ride to New Jersey to begin with, and she glanced up to Emily's face to see if maybe she was being profiled again. Emily had returned to looking out the window however. JJ marveled briefly about how much things had changed since their last plane ride. Then she hadn't even been willing to consider that she might not be straight. She certainly wouldn't have acted on kissing Emily, which, she reminded herself as a shiver of excitement ran down her spine, she had now done twice.

"Em?"

"Yeah?"

"When we get back…" JJ was suddenly unsure of what she wanted to ask. She wanted to talk to Emily. To spend some time with her away from work and away from the team. She didn't know how to word that though without it sounding strange to anybody else on the airplane who might be listening.

Emily read JJ's hesitation and decided to take matters into her own hands. "Right…I have to give you back those pots you lent me," she improvised. "You want to come over and pick them up?"

JJ faltered momentarily in surprise at the lie, but it worked for her. "Yeah. Thanks." JJ felt her cheeks flush slightly and she returned to looking out the window, trying to control it. _You're really going to have to control your blushing more if you expect to keep secrets when surrounded by profilers!_


	7. Chapter 7

"Pots?" For some reason it was all that JJ could think to say when she arrived at Emily's house.

Emily shrugged. "I don't know. It sounded like something I might borrow."

JJ laughed nervously. "I guess."

Emily blushed. "Oh shut up! So it was a lame lie. What did you want me to say? Would you like to come over for dinner? That would have sounded like I was asking you out!"

JJ inhaled sharply. "Right. Yeah. No…" She swallowed hard and tried to focus on breathing normally.

Emily eyed JJ thoughtfully. "You hungry?"

"Not really," JJ admitted. She was far too nervous to eat.

"You want to talk?" Emily asked.

JJ just nodded.

Emily took JJ's hand and led her to the living room. She sat her down on the couch and took a seat next to her.

They sat in awkward silence for a minute before Emily jumped up again. "Would you like something to drink? I've got water, juice, milk, wine, beer, scotch…"

"Scotch?" JJ raised an eyebrow in surprise.

Emily shrugged. "It takes the edge off nicely."

"I'll have a glass of wine please," JJ said.

"One glass of wine coming right up!" Emily headed to the kitchen. Once in there she stopped and looked around, trying to calm herself down. _Why are you so nervous? Why are you acting so insecure? It's JJ! You guys are friends! She's the one who's just figuring stuff out! You're supposed to be calm and collected so that you can advise her and support her!_ She breathed deeply and closed her eyes. When she reopened them, she was determined to be there for JJ in a purely platonic way.

Emily poured two glasses of wine and took them back into the living room, handing one to JJ. She set her glass down on the coffee table, and was about to take a seat again, when she decided that maybe she'd better bring the whole bottle in here. "One sec," she said as she left the room again. She returned and set the bottle of chardonnay down on the coffee table next to her glass. Unable to think of anything else to do to ease the obvious tension in the room she took a seat on the couch.

"Cheers," JJ suggested, holding up her glass.

Emily picked up her glass and followed suit. "Cheers." They clinked glasses and both indulged in a big gulp of wine.

The tedious silence settled back on the two of them and JJ began to squirm in her seat.

"Wanna watch some TV?" Emily suggested, picking up the remote.

"Sure," JJ relaxed slightly. Any noise besides the silence would be welcome.

Emily turned on the TV and began to flip channels. Nothing especially good was on so she settled for JAG reruns. Both women mindlessly turned their attention to the TV, though neither was really following the story.

Finally JJ couldn't stand the silence between them. "There are strings attached, you know."

Emily was caught off guard. It took her a second for her ears to process and another second or two for her brain to catch up with what JJ was alluding to. In that time her mouth had already gone ahead and said, "What?"

"With kissing. There are strings," JJ replied vaguely.

Emily turned to face JJ. "With us?" she prompted.

JJ nodded, unwilling to look at Emily.

"Why? I'm your friend. I'm here for you no matter what! I'm not going to read something into the kisses just because I'm gay. I just want to be able to help you if I can"

JJ didn't reply.

"Jayj," Emily scooted closer and reached out and tucked the hair that was hiding JJ's face from her view behind JJ's ear.

JJ shuddered involuntarily at the touch.

"Sorry," Emily pulled her hand back slightly confused.

"No…It's…" JJ didn't know how to put words to the thoughts in her racing brain. She turned and looked up into Emily's face and her heart skipped a beat. She realized instantly that it was a mistake to meet Emily's gaze, but it was too late. She leaned forward impulsively and brought her lips to Emily's.

Emily's surprise was soon taken over by attraction as she raised a hand to hold JJ's face to her own. She repositioned herself and deepened the kiss, going with her instincts. _What are you doing???_ Her subconscious screamed at her. She pulled back. "Sorry," she muttered.

Confusion and hurt welled up in JJ. "I keep kissing you, yet you keep saying you're sorry! What's with that?"

"It's just. I'm trying to be your friend and you're confused because you think you might like girls and I'm not helping things by kissing you. I'm not being a good friend," Emily tried to explain.

JJ stood up, felling slightly angry and still quite frustrated. "That's a lame excuse!"

"It's not a lame excuse!" Emily replied defensively, standing too. "You're confused and I'm not helping matters! If anything I'm making them worse!"

"I'm not confused because I think I like girls! I've basically figured out that I do. Now I'm confused because I like you and you're my colleague and every time I kiss you, you apologize and pull away! It's you I've been thinking about kissing every day since I found out you were gay! It's you who keeps making my heart flutter! You're who's confusing me! If you don't want to kiss me, just say so!" JJ turned and rushed towards the front door. She could feel tears starting to burn her eyes. She hadn't realized how true her words were until after she'd said them. She knew, deep down, that she liked girls. That wasn't really a question anymore. Now the only question was Emily and it seemed like she wasn't interested in anything but friendship.

Emily stood there in shock for a split second before she took off after JJ. In the entrance hall she grabbed JJ's wrist and turned her towards her. Emily gazed into JJ's deep blue eyes for a second, trying to let her sudden desire become clear to the blonde. Then she pushed JJ up against the wall and went in for a passionate kiss that sent flames of desire whipping through her body.

JJ's body responded more eagerly than her mind did. Her mind remained wary before desire overtook her too. Her arms wrapped around Emily and pulled her in closer as her mouth parted to let Emily's eager tongue in. All of the anger and frustration and confusion and nervousness that had been building up in her turned to heat. This felt so right and so hot that she couldn't believe it. Finally, when lack of oxygen threatened to make her head explode she turned her face to the side, breaking the kiss.

Emily opened her mouth as if to say something but JJ cut her off.

"Don't you dare apologize," she panted.

Emily grinned. "The thought never crossed my mind."

JJ smiled back. "Really?"

"Really," Emily replied. "I was just going to ask if maybe you'd consider not storming out of my house now."

JJ's smile widened. "I guess I could arrange that."

Emily leaned in slowly and placed a tender kiss on JJ's lips. "From the night that you told me that you'd kissed a girl, I started fantasizing about you kissing girls, and then I started fantasizing about you kissing me, and I felt like a horrible friend so I tried to push those thoughts away. I just wanted to be a good friend for you. I didn't want to pressure you. I wasn't trying to hurt you," Emily said as she leaned her forehead against JJ's, wanting to keep as much physical contact as possible.

"So you like me too?" JJ asked, feeling momentarily like she was back in middle school.

Emily smiled. "So much!"

"And you want to kiss me," JJ clarified.

"Rather a lot," Emily assured her.

"We should talk," JJ commented.

"Probably," Emily replied as she kissed the blonde softly again.

"Talking can wait," JJ corrected as she kissed Emily back, deeper.

Emily laughed softly as she took in the sweet smell of JJ and tried to memorize the feeling of JJ's lips touching her own. When they pulled apart again a few minutes later, Emily commented, "You're adjusting to making out with women remarkably well."

"It's a lot like making out with men, except that your lips are ridiculously softer than any guy's that I've ever kissed and you don't have any stubble to potentially scratch my face," JJ replied.

Emily laughed. "Thank God!"

JJ laughed too.

"I meant that you…You seem perfectly at ease with kissing me. I don't think I was that confident when I kissed my first girl," Emily tried to explain.

"You put me at ease. Besides…I had someone's brain to pick about kissing girls and stuff. You didn't," JJ pointed out as she and Emily walked hand in hand back to the couch.

"True," Emily acknowledged. "You must have just had a brilliant teacher."

JJ laughed. "Yep. Must have."

"This is a bad idea, you know," Emily said.

"What?" JJ asked.

"Us dating," Emily replied.

"Are we dating?" JJ inquired.

"Do you want to be dating?" Emily tried to dodge the question.

"Do you?" JJ shot back, not willing to let Emily wiggle out of answering her question so easily.

Emily took a deep breath. "I don't want to go back to pretending like I don't like you."

JJ smiled. "Good."

"I'd like to date you. If you want to date me, that is."

"What're you doing tomorrow night?" JJ asked.

"Going on a date with you?" Emily guessed with a grin.

"Good guess," JJ kissed Emily. She marveled at how easy this felt, how right and comfortable it was.

"So we're dating?" Emily asked, to clarify.

"Yes," JJ replied.

"It's a bad idea," Emily repeated.

"So you said. Care to explain?" JJ prompted.

"Well, for starters we work together," Emily pointed out.

"True," JJ conceded.

"For the FBI, where fraternization is strictly frowned upon," Emily continued.

"Also true," JJ nodded.

"And we work with profilers, which means that nothing stays secret for very long. For instance your sexuality," Emily pointed out.

"You've managed to hide your sexuality pretty well," JJ countered.

"Yeah, but I haven't been dating anyone. I haven't had a love life to talk about, making my sexuality kinda irrelevant," Emily said. "Dating someone, especially you, who I work with…That's gonna be a lot harder to hide. It's not like we work in an office where everyone just ignores each other and gets their jobs done. We all profile each other all the time without even trying. Us dating is going to come out, and I'm guessing sooner than we want it to."

JJ nervousness began to return the more she thought about it. Everything felt right here in Emily's apartment and here with just the two of them. Out in the real world, things were different, harsher, and definitely not as safe and comfortable. "Right."

"Still want to date me?" Emily asked, sensing the change in JJ.

JJ looked up in surprise. "Yeah!"

Emily grinned. "Good."

JJ smiled back and then her face became serious again as a thought struck her. "This is going to get complicated really quickly isn't it?"

Emily nodded. "Probably."

JJ swallowed hard.

"But we'll face whatever comes together," Emily added as she stroked JJ's hair.

JJ relaxed. Together sounded really good.


	8. Chapter 8

Author's Note: Sorry this update has been so long coming. I have had lots of things going on like getting married and job hunting, etc, etc... I'll try to be better about updating, but I promise nothing. Thanks to everyone who's reviewed it, especially recently because whenever I get a review it makes me think about a piece of writing, especially if it's been a while since I worked on it and motivates me to work on it again, which is what happened for this update, with a recent review from GA Jane Doe, so thanks, and I hope you like it!

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JJ opened her eyes to find sunlight shining brightly around an unfamiliar bedroom and she could feel somebody laying next to her. She sat up with a start.

"Hey. You ok?" Emily's sleepy voice asked from beside her.

JJ looked down at the brunette and the events of the last few days rolled over her. "What? Yeah. I'm ok. It's just…"

"Weird? New? Scary? Strange? Intimidating?" Emily suggested.

"All of the above?" JJ glanced at Emily to make sure that Emily wasn't offended by her response.

"That's to be expected," Emily replied calmly. She reached up and stroked JJ's long blonde hair, and reveled in the fact that she could do that without JJ shying away or getting awkward. She had a right to now, they were dating. "You're amazing, do you know that?"

JJ blushed and shook her head. "Why?"

"Because you're dealing with everything so well, and…well, because you're you."

JJ's blush deepened. "I think I'm dealing so well because it hasn't really hit me yet. It hasn't sunk in. I mean logically I can think, ok, I'm dating a girl, specifically my colleague, Emily. I made out with her last night. I fell asleep in the same bed as her last night, and I woke up still laying next to her this morning. But it doesn't feel…I don't know…real yet or something."

Emily smiled. "Yeah, I know what you mean. Just wait until after the first time we have sex," she teased.

JJ's face turned a bright crimson and she looked away. Emily realized immediately that she might have screwed up.

"I mean, not that I'm expecting that to be soon, or…I mean, you know, whenever you're comfortable with it…" Emily groaned and covered her face with her hands. "Shit! JJ, I didn't mean that. I just…"

JJ got her breathing back under control and turned back to face Emily. "No, I know…You were teasing."

Emily nodded. "Sorry."

"Do you want to have sex with me?" JJ asked, suddenly curious. She had been considering and fantasizing about the making out part for a week now, she'd just about adjusted to that, but sex…Sex was a new idea. Of course sex makes sense, and if the way Emily kissed was anything to judge by, it would be incredible. JJ felt a jolt of excitement shoot through her.

Emily regarded her friend carefully. She wasn't quite sure of JJ's motivations for asking, and she didn't want to scare her off. Of course Emily wanted to have sex with her! JJ was gorgeous and intelligent and funny and so adorable, not to mention incredibly sexy and an amazing kisser. Part of Emily wanted to tear JJ's clothes off last night and have her right there downstairs on the couch. Of course she hadn't because she knew that it would be too soon for JJ. Way too soon. JJ had just figured out that she liked girls. Emily wasn't sure how to respond. She wanted to make sure that JJ knew that she was desirable and the Emily wanted her, but she didn't want JJ to feel pressured. "Yes. I do."

"You had to think about that a bit too much," JJ commented feeling a bit hurt.

Emily sighed, clearly her response hadn't been successful. "JJ, of course I want you!"

JJ eyed Emily thoughtfully. Part of her believed her, but part of her couldn't help thinking that Emily was just saying that not to hurt her.

Emily could see that JJ wasn't fully convinced, so she sat up and looked her squarely in the face, bringing her hand up to gently caress JJ's cheek. "Jennifer Jareau, you are incredibly sexy, and I would love to have sex with you, but you're not ready yet, and I'm not sure I'm ready to have sex with you yet. We have other things to work out first, other steps to take. But trust me, I want you." Emily leaned in and pulled JJ into her at the same time, pressing their lips lightly, yet passionately together. JJ's lips parted slightly and Emily took that as an open invitation, sliding her tongue in and tasting JJ's sweet tongue. She couldn't help feeling elated. She certainly had never thought that she'd be getting to do this with JJ, not like this, not as a couple. She pulled away and grinned at JJ. "I love doing that with you."

"Yeah?" JJ bit her lip nervously.

"Definitely!"

JJ beamed back at her. "Me too." JJ flopped back in the bed. "Wow."

"Wow what?" Emily asked.

"Just wow! I can't believe that this is happening! It's just so surreal. I mean, I have a girlfriend, and not in the 'my girlfriend and I are getting our nails done later, you should come with us' way, but in the 'I just made out with my girlfriend and she wants to have sex with me' way."

Emily lay back next to JJ and examined her face. "You're ok with it though, right?"

JJ nodded. "Yeah. It's just…surreal."

The two lay in silence for a few minutes, each lost in their own thoughts.

"Can I ask you something?" JJ asked.

"Yeah, sure. Anything," Emily replied.

"It's stupid. I don't know…I just…I mean I never really thought about it…and, well…" JJ blushed. "Nevermind. It's stupid."

"Come on! What were you gonna ask? There are no stupid questions," Emily prodded.

"There are plenty of stupid questions, and this is one of them," JJ contradicted.

"You're stubborn, you know that?" Emily teased.

"I'm aware. It's just…I really would feel ridiculous asking this question."

"Ask it anyway. It's just me," Emily encouraged her.

It was JJ's turn to cover her face with her hands. "Ok, well, it's just…How does sex work?"

Emily gave JJ a sidelong glance. "Nobody ever taught you about the birds and the bees?"

JJ glared. "It's more that nobody taught me about if it's birds and birds."

"Gotcha. Well…I could try to explain it, but really, it's just…it won't mean much. I mean there are various things you can do…it's just. I think it would be better if you experienced it for yourself. You'll figure it out."

"What if I'm bad at it? What if I get you naked and have no idea what to do?" JJ kept her hands firmly over her face in embarrassment.

Emily's breath caught for a second at the idea of them being naked together, but she tried to focus on the conversation at hand. "Baby, I'm sure that's not going to happen. You may be…nervous your first time, but there's no way that you're going to be bad at it. You couldn't be. You know what you like done to you, you just do that to me…I'm really not explaining very well, but I promise you: when the time is right, whenever it happens, whenever we're both ready, it'll be perfect."

JJ peered through her fingers, Emily's words were both reassuring and making her nervous at the same time. She didn't know how to respond. Somehow she'd felt more confident last night. This morning, she knew she still wanted to be with Emily, but the other uncertainties and what exactly being with Emily meant were starting to get to her. "This is kind of overwhelming."

"It probably will be for a while, and unfortunately I don't know how long we'll be able to keep this a secret. I think Hotch may already suspect, and Morgan…well, underneath all of his jokes, he's actually quite perceptive. And Garcia…well you know Garcia. Rossi probably wouldn't care one way or the other, so even if he figures it out he'll probably keep it to himself. Reid…well? Reid won't figure it out. Or he'll be confused. Then Morgan will point it out, and he'll still be confused. I feel like he's the only one who might be awkward about it."

"Still, we're breaking a bureau rule. And what if, I don't know…What if the rest of the team is awkward about it. And I don't think I'm ready for people to know! I mean I just figured it out! You really think that Hotch already suspects?"

"I don't know exactly what he suspects, but he knows that something is up with you, and possibly with us. You know Hotch though…He'll look out for us. It's just who he is," Emily tried to comfort her.

"Yeah…but still…" JJ was uneasy with the idea of anyone else knowing.

"Sweetie, it'll be ok," Emily said earnestly, trying to pry JJ's fingers off of her eyes. "Quit hiding!"

JJ shook her head.

"Please?"

JJ peaked through her fingers again. "Too embarrassed still," she replied.

"Don't be! Please? Besides, it's so much harder to kiss you through your hands! Please?" Emily pleaded.

JJ relented. "Well, can't argue with reasoning like that."

Emily grinned then kissed her tenderly on the lips. "I don't think I'll ever get sick of doing that!"

JJ smiled back at her. "Good," she replied softly, then pulled Emily in for a deeper kiss. Somewhere in the back of her brain a small voice was saying, "You're making out with your girlfriend, in her bed," but most of her brain was far too focused on the fire rushing through her brains because of the feel of Emily's luscious, soft lips on her own.

______________________________________________________________________________________________________

"Hey my love," Garcia greeted JJ.

"Hey Garcia, what's up?" JJ replied, suddenly extremely self conscious about the fact that she was still in Emily's bed. With Garcia, it sometimes seemed like she could read minds, and this was definitely not something that JJ was ready to have Garcia know.

"How are you doing my dear? I heard that the most recent case had you especially upset. You doing ok?"

JJ swallowed hard. "Oh...yeah. Umm…last night did me wonders. I just needed to relax. I'm feeling a lot better."

"Are you sure? You still sound a little shaken," Garcia sounded concerned. "How about you come over tonight and I make you dinner? That way you don't have to worry about anything?"

JJ grit her teeth.

Emily, who was watching JJ as she talked to Garcia mouthed, "What's wrong?" to her girlfriend, but JJ waved her away.

"Actually, I can't tonight," JJ replied, dreading the next questions that she was sure Garcia would ask.

"Oh," Emily muttered, figuring out what the conversation must be about and understanding the look on JJ's face.

"How come? It'll be fun, I promise!" Garcia prodded.

"I know, I've just got other plans," JJ explained.

"Oh? Who with? You can't blow them off for some down time with your best friend?"

JJ groaned internally. "I really can't. Sorry."

"So who're they with? What're you doing?"

JJ was stuck. If she told Garcia that it was a date, Garcia wouldn't relent until she knew who it was with. If she told Garcia she was hanging out with Emily, she would want to know why she couldn't just cancel on Emily.

Emily stole the phone from her. "She's hanging out with me Garcia, and she can't ditch me because we're already hanging out! Don't worry though, I've got a plan to relax her and take her mind off of the case. I promise I'll take could care of her."

"Emily? Well why didn't JJ just say she was with you?"

"Beats me!" Emily lied through her teeth.

"Well…what are you two going to do?" Garcia inquired.

It was Emily's turn to groan internally. "Just stuff. I want to surprise her, so I can't tell you right now. I promise you that it will help relax her though. Just trust me. When JJ comes to work tomorrow, you will find little to no trace of the stress from our last case. Besides, I could really use the relaxation too."

"Is it a spa? I bet it's a spa! Good thinking Emily Prentiss," Garcia said.

"Garcia? I will see you tomorrow!" Emily cut her friend off.

"Ok! Love to both of you!" Garcia replied.

"Bye," Emily hung up the phone and looked sympathetically at JJ. "Well, Garcia's convinced that we're going to a spa."

"We could roll with that lie. I can't think of a better one. I'm surprised she didn't try to invite herself along," JJ replied.

"I think I cut her off before she had a chance to," Emily said thoughtfully.

"It's not going to take her very long to figure out that we're dating, is it?" JJ asked.

"Probably not. She does have the head start of already knowing that I'm gay. And she knows both of us pretty well."

"We could deny it when she figures it out," JJ said hopefully.

Emily sat down next to JJ and ran a hand through her hair comfortingly. "We'll face that bridge when we come to it. For now, let's just enjoy our day. We're going to have our first real date today," Emily reminded her.

JJ grinned. "I can't wait."


End file.
